Divorce involves many complicated questions, but when children are involved, the process can become more complex. While no two divorces are the same, divorcing parents in Massachusetts often have similar concerns.
The effects on the children
For most parents, the main concern with divorce is the impact it can have on the children. Divorce will disrupt children’s lives, so some changes and reactions are to be expected. When children experience their parents’ divorce, their behavior might change temporarily as they process the changes, their grades might suffer and they might deal with a range of emotions, such as anxiety, anger, guilt and fear.
Telling the children
Parents might struggle about when and how to tell children about divorce. While this might be a difficult conversation, the parents should tell the children. Telling the children about the divorce together can send a reassuring message to the children that their parents are still committed to them and the family, even if the romantic relationship has ended. Some of the things to keep in mind when you speak to the children include:
- Keeping the conversation direct and clear
- Avoiding sharing details as to the issues between the parents
- Providing information about the upcoming changes
- Offering support and love to the children
How to move forward
Divorce often involves many family law details as the parents work out custody and craft a parenting agreement. Moving forward takes patience and flexibility as all the family members adapt to their new life. You can help your children move forward by offering them stability at home and in routines and allowing them grace to work through their emotions.
Taking care of yourself is also important as you go through a divorce and take care of children. Make sure you allow yourself the space to work through your emotions and accept the changes.